Monday, July 31, 2006
ORIGASMI THE SENSUAL ART OF FOLDING PAPER
by SCOTT STEVENS
TOKYO
"Now you fold the paper this way, and then you fold it over like this -- and then, if you've done it right, you will barely be able to concentrate!"
So exclaimed Miraka Yong, demonstrating the ancient art form she made famous in her Japanese best-seller, Origasmi -- The Sensual Art of Folding Paper.
"Paper is like a lover, very soft, very sensual," Yong told Weekly World News. "Yet it has a cutting edge if you mishandle it.
The secret to achieving sexual gratification through paper -- as with a lover -- is to handle it slowly, building the tension and then press -ing down firmly to take control."
Origasmi is becoming so popular with young Japanese women that government officials are worried about a population fall-off.
"Young Japanese women arebored with Japanese guys who spend all their time working, playing video games or entertaining clients in karaoke bars," said a member of Japan's Ministry of Social Trends, who insisted upon anonymity.
"Now they're taking matters into their own hands."
As can be expected, many Japanese men are quite upset by the fad. "My girlfriend replaced me with rice paper," said Toby Akiro. "I've lost all respect among my friends and colleagues. Except for Akira, whose wife left him for a piece of corrugated cardboard. He said she liked it rough. He understands."
According to Yong, Origasmi began centuries ago, when Japan was ruled by warlords.
"While the men were away fighting, the rulers gave the women paper so that they could write to the soldiers and improve their morale," she said.
"But not all women knew how to write, and as they folded the paper to make tokens for their men they found the experience stimulating."
The paper industry is under- standably ecstatic about Origasmi.
"With the growth of e-mail and the Internet, paper use has been way down," said Barry Cobbs, a paper magnate. "This has made paper sexy again -- in a whole new way."
As Yong put it, "Origasmi would definitely be something to write home about -- if I wasn't so busy using the paper for another purpose."
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