Sunday, February 21, 2010
The 30 Most Important Cats of 2009
[Thanks for the link, Bibimimi]
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30: Indifferent Cat
Her now-legendary disdain for French bulldog puppies has earned her a permanent place in the annals of cats who don't really give a damn about anyone else. Watch her in action.
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29: Fan Kitten
Neither his youth nor his inexperience could prevent him from the Herculean struggle of taking up arms against the very wind in his quest for justice. Fan Kitten is one of the most inspiring cats of 2009.
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28: Average Cats
After a year dominated by cats who are hovercrafts, or monorails, or demigods, the Average Cats arrived with grace and dignity (if not fanfare) to remind us that we are no less beautiful for being underachievers. Some might say that they are the quiet heroes of 2009.
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27: Pillow Cat
Some we admire for their triumph over adversity; others for their resolve in the face of an overwhelming opponent. Pillow cat kind of just got owned.
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26: Zombie Cat
In a difficult year where many have felt powerless, Zombie Cat represented the singleminded focus on survival that has allowed us to struggle on. In a way, we are all Zombie Cat.
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25: Awkward Roommate Cat
Awkward Roommate Cat showed us some of the downsides of sharing our lives with these unfathomable creatures, though it may have been better if she hadn't.
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24: SOS Cat
Unlike many of these (let's be honest) entirely useless animals, SOS Cat actually tried to do something during this difficult year. Get help, SOS Cat. Get. Help.
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23: Matrix: Reloaded Cat
In a sea of Agent Smith puppies, Matrix: Reloaded Cat was defiant, and so captivating that you could almost forget, for a moment, how shatteringly awful that movie was.
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22: Asshole Cat
A poignant reminder that the best laid plans (etc.)? Or just a jerk? Either way, Asshole Cat did strong work this year, and takes pride of place here as a representative of all the countless housecats who are governed by malice rather than affection.
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21: Vase Cat
It takes courage that you and I cannot understand to live your life divorced from earthly comforts and shut off from the polluting influence of the outside world. Vase Cat was a reminder, this year, that it's not about where you live, but how.
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20: Boozecats
Better than an intervention, Boozecats found their way into any photo where booze might have been. They didn't make you any less drunk, but they showed you what life could have been like if you had made better decisions.
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19: Om Nom Nom Cat
This guy actually said Om Nom Nom while eating, at once exploding and reappropriating a stereotype that had threatened to overshadow the tender realities of feline dining habits.
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18: Have You Seen This Cat?
Thousands of people saw this cat in 2009, and those who were not refreshed and encouraged by the experience have only themselves to blame.
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17: Chilling Cat
Not many of us can make our mark on the world simply by sitting there, but this armchair philosopher taught us that inaction can sometimes speak louder than words.
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16: Ignored Cat
A stark reminder of the impassable solitude of our existence, even when we are in company.
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15: Crazy Dance Cat
If a cat does a crazy dance when no one is there to see it, does only God LOL?
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14: Jupiter
Jupiter burst onto the scene this year with a startling insight into the feline mind. We may not be much the better for it, but thanks to Jupiter, we finally know what cats are really thinking.
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13: Weather Cat
Early in 2009, Weather Cat forecast that we could expect a veritable onslaught of cats over the next 11 months. His prescience was never rewarded.
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12: Couch Kitten
Some of us are blessed with the courage to stand up and face our destiny; others are imbued with the wisdom to hide in the couch until it's all over. Couch Kitten proved to be one of the latter sort.
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11: ROLCats
The 2009 ROLCats Revolution took Internet cats from the avaricious grasp of the Bourgeoisie and gave them back to the Proletariat, where they could be put to real use for the good of the State.
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And Now For The Big Guns …
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10: Chopstick Cat
What words are there to describe the majesty and grace that this animal brought to the hitherto mundane task of eating tuna with chopsticks? Watch and marvel.
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9: Kitten Mittens
The greatest innovation in cat technology since the flea collar, and the brave animal who pioneered it…
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8: Nora, The Concerto Cat
2009 also saw the first ever feline performance of a piano concerto. Talk about shattering the glass ceiling.
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7: Turntable Kitten
Somewhere, in that magical place where our aspirations meet our better selves, Turntable Kitten still spins, and every rotation is kinetic energy for our dreams.
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6: Shower Cat
Shower Cat taught us that utility is the enemy of creativity, and that the physical world is but a tool to enrich our lives while we still can.
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5. Gyoza Cat
Gyoza Cat brought us one simple message this year that will resonate for many years to come: Be patient, and eat dumplings.
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4. Surprise Kitten
Surprise Kitten surprised us all this month with his normal postural play response mechanism, and I for one, will never be the same.
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3. Kittens, Inspired By Kittens
Kittens, Inspired By Kittens, inspired by the countless unheralded kittens who have inspired us all, and who will continue to inspire us as we cast our thoughts towards an uncertain but fiercely hopeful future.
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2. Maru
Maru, you unfettered genius. Have I ever mentioned that you are my everything? This was your finest performance in 2009.
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1. Keyboard Cat
In many ways, 2009 was the Year Of Keyboard Cat. His one, timeless, performance gave force and new meaning to some of the most difficult moments of our lives this year. I think this video was the culmination of that wild, wild ride. When Keyboard Cat played off Hall & Oates, in reality, he was playing us all off, and we are all the better for it.
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